Negative Nancy
I know, I know, I have been very quiet since the piklet post.
I have felt like ingnoring my infertility.
I have been a very negative Nancy.
This Friday I find out about my non natural FET. I do not feel encouraged or positive. People around me are positive for me. My husband thinks that I might as well give up if I'm not being positive. He's probably right but I have no reason to believe this will work. I need an attitude transplant!
I did a stupid thing. I weed on a stick today. The logic behind my actions was rather morbid. I thought a positive result would mean nothing in particular due to the chemical pregnancy factor and that a negative result would soften the blow for Friday. It was negative. Am I on the right track? Action Man thinks it doesn't mean anything. My friend L who did IVF said I should ignore it. I am confused.
I should not have done the test because now I am furious that I cannot even conjure up a chemical pregnancy.
What a depressing post.
There have been good things going on.
Action Man has finished the roof on our extension and now he has begun the cladding. He is recycling weather boards down the side of the house that meets the original weatherboards. He is using brand new ones for the back which will be the most visible. It is looking mighty fine.
As the rain has held Hubby up lately he has also been completing the wall removal inside. I can know fully appreciate the space of my new open plan lounge, dining and kitchen. It is massive.
We are still planning our kitchen, tooing and froing with our decision making on benchtops. Of course cost is a deciding factor as well.
Our two sets of bi folding doors arrive in 4 weeks time and by then the cladding should be just about done.
I marvel at my husband. He is amazing. Apart from quite a bit of help from his Dad on weekends, Action Man has been building the extension solo. He manages to fit it all in on his days off and still manages to keep up his fitness regime with his friends. I get weary just thinking about it all.
I got my dusty bike out of the shed the other day and set out for a ride with my friend B who is 17 weeks pregnant. I was ashamed at the amount of dust that had gathered on my bike which used to be ridden at least once a week. I don't think I have been on it since December! It was unreal to feel the pain in my legs and the chilly wind stinging my face. Sadly it started to rain heavily and B and I had to return to her woodheater to dry our soaking bodies. We vowed to get out there and do a lot more riding but I don't think B will be doing it for too much longer! No excuse for me though!
I have felt like ingnoring my infertility.
I have been a very negative Nancy.
This Friday I find out about my non natural FET. I do not feel encouraged or positive. People around me are positive for me. My husband thinks that I might as well give up if I'm not being positive. He's probably right but I have no reason to believe this will work. I need an attitude transplant!
I did a stupid thing. I weed on a stick today. The logic behind my actions was rather morbid. I thought a positive result would mean nothing in particular due to the chemical pregnancy factor and that a negative result would soften the blow for Friday. It was negative. Am I on the right track? Action Man thinks it doesn't mean anything. My friend L who did IVF said I should ignore it. I am confused.
I should not have done the test because now I am furious that I cannot even conjure up a chemical pregnancy.
What a depressing post.
There have been good things going on.
Action Man has finished the roof on our extension and now he has begun the cladding. He is recycling weather boards down the side of the house that meets the original weatherboards. He is using brand new ones for the back which will be the most visible. It is looking mighty fine.
As the rain has held Hubby up lately he has also been completing the wall removal inside. I can know fully appreciate the space of my new open plan lounge, dining and kitchen. It is massive.
We are still planning our kitchen, tooing and froing with our decision making on benchtops. Of course cost is a deciding factor as well.
Our two sets of bi folding doors arrive in 4 weeks time and by then the cladding should be just about done.
I marvel at my husband. He is amazing. Apart from quite a bit of help from his Dad on weekends, Action Man has been building the extension solo. He manages to fit it all in on his days off and still manages to keep up his fitness regime with his friends. I get weary just thinking about it all.
I got my dusty bike out of the shed the other day and set out for a ride with my friend B who is 17 weeks pregnant. I was ashamed at the amount of dust that had gathered on my bike which used to be ridden at least once a week. I don't think I have been on it since December! It was unreal to feel the pain in my legs and the chilly wind stinging my face. Sadly it started to rain heavily and B and I had to return to her woodheater to dry our soaking bodies. We vowed to get out there and do a lot more riding but I don't think B will be doing it for too much longer! No excuse for me though!
posted by Betty at
6:40 pm
4 Comments:
I like to ignore my infertility, too. That sucks about the negative stick--- I'd be feeling negative, too. But if you weren't supposed to test until Friday, AM and L are probably right... the stick might not be correct. I know it feels like whistling in the dark to tell yourself that, and it's even harder to actually believe. I'll be hoping for you. Take care.
By
Kris, at 11:18 am
Don't read my blog today because I'm not in a good mood either.
But as for the stick -- sticks are just evil. I wish they were as easy to ignore as infertility can sometimes be easy to ignore.
By
Anonymous, at 2:35 am
How are you doing, dear?
By
Kris, at 9:56 am
I echo Spanglish. Sticks cause so much anguish. Remember though, a negative stick today can be a positive one in a few days.
By
Eggs Akimbo, at 1:53 am
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